


Your Halo

by camichats



Category: Marvel
Genre: Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Angel Wings, Assassination Attempt(s), Established Bucky Barnes/Tony Stark, Feelings Realization, Getting Together, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:08:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24002617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camichats/pseuds/camichats
Summary: Natasha is sent on a mission to kill a demon who's been getting too close to a human of interest. When she recognizes her old mentor and sees how different love has made him, she needs to understand.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark
Comments: 11
Kudos: 114
Collections: Marvel Polyship Bingo 2020, Natasha Bingo





	1. I can feel your halo

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for Natasha Romanov Bingo O5-Angels/Demons AU

Angels were fierce. They were guardians, warriors. Natasha didn't understand the change that humans went through in the past several centuries. Humans used to understand that angels were not their friends. These days, she had met many humans that thought angels were kindhearted beings, here to protect mankind. She followed orders. She had killed thousands of babies where they laid in their beds once; that had not been kind, that had been an order that she didn't question. 

It was the same now: she was following an order to find the human Anthony Edward Stark and the demon that had wormed its way into his life, then kill the demon. She didn't know why the demon was bothering, and she didn't know why the Lord cared so much, but it wasn't her place to question it. Even if it were her place, she didn't care. Being in human form was nice. She got to eat and drink, dress in a shirt and pants instead of a robe, and pet any cats she saw. She'd killed a thousand demons before now, and she'd kill a thousand demons after; this mission was of no consequence. 

Stark Tower was easy to find, even amidst the other skyscrapers that needled at the sky. She preferred humans when the highest they could build was two rocks stacked atop each other. Once they started using stone for their own creations, that's when it all went downhill. 

She entered the building and walked to the elevator, and no one stopped her. She would have ignored them and kept walking even if they had tried, but it was easier this way, all the same. Natasha hit the button for the top floor. If it wasn't where she needed to be, she could use the stairs and sweep every floor. If the demon wasn't here, Stark would either know where he was or know when they would likely see each other again, in which case she could wait. The elevator told her that she needed a password to get there, and she tapped the floor button again, her finger glowing momentarily with celestial light as she overrode it. It dinged, then started moving upwards. 

This was not going to be fun. Not that she was used to fun, but it was going to be ugly. Ugly was always messy. Humans felt so strongly. Someone they knew for a week could be worth crying over under the right circumstances. 

It was a long ride up to the top, and she used it to very specifically not think about what was about to happen. Demons were a mix of angel and human. All the originals were angels who fell from grace, gaining humanity when they fell through the earth before sinking to the bottom of the pits of hell; their offspring were even more like humans, and it was never divine to feel as though she was slaughtering the Lord's creation of love. 

There was another ding, and the doors opened to a large, open floor plan. She sensed life ahead and slightly to the left, so she started walking in that direction. Two life forces, hopefully one of them was the demon in question, otherwise this would get nasty in a hurry. 

An angel could always recognize a demon on sight, and this time was no exception, even if it wasn't needed. That was a face Natasha was intimately familiar with. 

They both looked over when she came into the room, and while the human was immediately scared and wondering how she got there, the demon widened his eyes, something like acceptance already there. He put a hand on the human's arm before he could panic too much, not taking his eyes off of her. "Natasha," he said evenly. 

"Bucky." Her mentor. He'd taught her how to wield her sword and channel the heavenly fire that coursed through her veins, and all of it had felt useless following his fall from grace; she couldn't save him because he didn't want to be saved. He hadn't given her any warning, it was just that one day he was there and the next, he wasn't. She didn't think about it. 

"Bucky?" the human said. "What's going on? Who is she?" 

Bucky's hand squeezed his arm comfortingly, but still, he didn't look away. He knew what would happen if he stopped paying attention to her. "I told you I wouldn't be around forever, sweetheart. I'm sorry we didn't get longer." He got to his feet. "Let's not do this here. If I go with you, you'll leave Tony alone, right?" 

Natasha wanted to express her confusion, but she didn't. Bucky should've known that she was here for him, and him alone. "I am only here for you." 

Bucky swallowed thickly, nodding. "Okay." 

"No," Tony said, jumping to his feet and sticking himself in the space between Bucky and her. "I don't know what the fuck is going on here, but no. Bucky hasn't done anything wrong, I'm not going to let you hurt him." 

"Get out of the way," Bucky said through his teeth, wrapping an arm around Tony's waist and shoving Tony behind him. 

"What're you- Bucky, stop it," Tony said, squirming to try and get free of his hold. Unsuccessfully, of course. Bucky might not be an angel anymore, but a demon could be just as strong if they knew what they were doing. "You can't seriously be about to go with her!" 

"Don't worry about it, Tony." 

"Don't worry about it?" Tony repeated incredulously, voice spiraling higher in his distress. "You're about to run off to get murdered in some fucking back alley, and you think I shouldn't worry?" 

"Tony," Bucky said, a distinct note of pleading in his voice. He was worried that he was trying Natasha's patience; he was worried that she was going to kill Bucky in front of his human lover. 

She tilted her head, peering at the human curiously. "What makes him so special? Why would you risk everything for him?" 

"Excuse you, I'm a god damn delight," Tony said, affronted. "And all you have to do is leave without him and then he's not risking anything." 

They both ignored him. 

"You don't understand love. None of us could, it's a prison up there." 

"We all love our father." He wasn't a father in the way humans had fathers. He was more like... a creator. A boss. 

"You have an obligation to him, it's not the same thing. Haven't you ever wondered what it would be like to feel? Truly  _ feel _ , instead of pushing it all down and not thinking about it." 

She said nothing, but Bucky could see that he was getting to her, she knew that he could see that. All she had to do was open her hand and her sword would be summoned to her side. One little motion, and she could end all this confusion and go back to the heavens. 

"What's it like?" she asked, her voice a quiet whisper in the air. 

"Like nothing you've felt before," he answered, just as softly. 

Tony was looking between the two of them, worried and so incredibly terrified. He was still clinging to Bucky like he could stop him from leaving from will alone. 

Natasha should ignore him. She should take him out of the human's sight and end it before either of them could suffer further. But she already knew that her hesitation would cost her if she managed to go through with it, and she knew the fact that she'd hesitated at all meant she wasn't going to do it. She wanted to know what was special about Bucky's human. She wanted to know how Bucky felt so deeply when he'd fallen so recently.


	2. This don't even feel like falling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For Marvel Polyship Bingo: N4-Wing Fic

Falling from grace was the easiest thing Natasha had ever done. They'd told horror stories of it in heaven, of the way it felt like losing a piece of your soul. Losing your halo was supposed to be the greatest pain you could ever know, like every molecule in your body was being taken apart and half of it wrenched from you before the remains were shoved back in. Bucky hadn't lost his wings when he fell, but there had been tales of others that only had skeletal remains when they dragged themselves back to the earth. 

It wasn't like that for Natasha. She reached up and took the halo off. There had been resistance, and it had hurt as the grace separated itself from her, but it was something she was giving up, not something that was being taken from her. It was her choice. The second choice she had ever made. The first had been to spare Bucky, and the second to remove her halo. 

She liked it. She was _allowed_ to like it, and that was a thrill. 

She didn't fall from heaven through earth and down to the pits of hell. She was on earth, took off her halo, and that is where she stayed. Bucky's wings-- hidden from human eyes but not hers-- had turned from silver to pitch black from his fall; her wings stayed golden. 

Bucky was at her side for every step she took. She learned the human's name: Tony. Tony was good. Bucky had been drawn to that, and it was likely one of the reasons she'd been sent to stop him. There was a chance someone else would be sent after them, but sending someone to deal with the two best warriors the heavens had ever seen would be useless for them. 

"What's going on?" Tony asked. Natasha had fallen from grace yesterday, and he'd agreed to let her stay with them when Bucky asked. But now he wanted answers. Did he know he had fire in his blood? "How do you know each other and where the hell is she from? She showed up and overrode security with a tap of her finger, I'm not sure I trust her around you long term, especially since it kinda looked like she was here to kill you. No offense," he added, glancing at her. 

"None taken." 

Bucky chewed on his lip, looking at Natasha, then Tony, and back again. "Do you remember when you asked where I came from?" 

"You said hell," Tony recalled, smirking. 

"Yes. It... wasn't a joke." 

Tony blinked in confusion. "What?" 

"I know how it sounds, sweetheart, but this is going to sound insane and I need you to trust me." 

"What's going to sound insane?" he asked slowly. "More insane than you being from hell not being a joke?" 

"Natasha and I- we uh, used to be angels. Only, you can't stay on Earth if you want to remain an angel. I'm not sure if it's just a rule or if being down here makes you feel different, but it's- it doesn't last. I met you and... became a demon. So that I could stay." Bucky glanced at her. "Natasha was sent to kill me yesterday, and instead, she did the same as I had." 

Tony blinked once, twice, then shook his head. "You're angels?" 

"Used to be," Natasha said. Bucky had gained tone variance and inflection in his time here, but Natasha hadn't learned it yet. Emotion was within reach, she could feel it like fog against her fingertips, but for now, her voice was flat, monotonous. 

Tony opened his mouth, closed it, and shook his head again. "You understand why I can't just take your word for that, right? I mean- I want to believe you if only because the other option is that you're losing it, but I-." He blew out a breath. "Bucky, what do you mean you came to Earth and decided to stay?" 

"I met you," Bucky said. 

The way he was looking at Tony, the obvious affection there... Natasha wanted that. Yearning was new to her, but Lord, was it powerful. 

"And- what, so Natasha came to kill you and changed her mind in twenty seconds? Sure, I guess I can buy that you fell so in love with me that you decided to stay-- I am pretty great-- but her? What does she get out of this?" 

"Freedom." 

They both looked at her. 

She met their eyes evenly. "Little more than that," she lied. She wanted love and happiness and anger and fear; she wanted the range of emotions. She wanted friendship. She wanted love. She was greedy for it, and it hadn't been twenty four hours since she lost her grace yet. There had to be a cap on this, because she wouldn't survive if it kept getting stronger for days on end. 

Bucky nodded, but he knew that there was more to it than that. She hadn't asked what it was like to not follow orders, she'd asked him what it was like to _feel_. She'd expected for him to know better; she hadn't expected for Tony to notice it as well. There was a strange warm tingle in her stomach, and she didn't know exactly what it meant. But she thought... she could learn to like it. 

Tony swallowed thickly, burying his face in his hands. "I want to believe you, I do, but I- I don't know if- I can't-" 

"Tony," Bucky said, putting a hand on his arm. 

When he lifted his head again, Bucky had his wings out. Tony's eyes went wide and a hand automatically reached out. He paused before he could make contact, his gaze darting to Bucky's face. "Can I touch them?" 

"Gently." 

Tony nodded, then looked at his wings again. He moved slowly, sinking his fingers into the layers of feathers. He let out a breath, shoulders falling. "I guess this means..." he stopped and cleared his throat. "You're a demon?" 

"Yes." 

"And what does it- I mean, what does that really mean for you?" 

"I'm not quite sure yet," Bucky admitted. "I have more in common with humans than angels now." 

"You have _wings_." 

Bucky quirked a smile at him. Natasha watched it with a sense of wonder. He was... soft. Tender. For angels, he had been fond of her-- and her of him-- but it was nothing compared to the way he was now. Bucky leaned closer, letting Tony's hand fall further into his feathers. 

Tony grinned at him, then glanced at Natasha. "Do you have wings too?" 

In response, Natasha brought hers out. 

"Wow," Tony breathed. "That's gorgeous. How come hers are gold and yours are black?" 

"I fell from grace. Natasha..." Bucky's eyes flicked to her, then away again. He'd told her last night that he was worried about how easy her transition had been. "Floated, from grace. It's been different from her." 

"Huh," Tony said, petting his hand through the feathers. Bucky shuddered, then put a hand on his wrist and stopped him. "Shit sorry, was I hurting you?" 

"Hurting isn't exactly the word I would use." 

Natasha tilted her head in curiosity, but Bucky didn't elaborate. She'd groomed his wings for him a thousand times and never elicited a reaction like that, and he'd helped her groom without her feeling whatever that was either. Maybe it's because they both knew what they were doing, and Tony didn't. 

Between one blink of the eye and the next, Natasha tucked her wings away, but Bucky kept his out for the rest of the conversation. Maybe it was to lend validity to their story, but more likely was to get Tony used to seeing them. This talk was mostly between Bucky and Tony, and she found herself staring at the bend of Bucky's wings, the unkempt mess of his hair, and the stubble along his jaw. Angels didn't have stubble. The last time she had seen him, his jaw had been as smooth as her own. 

She knew him, but how well did that information hold? There was an ache in the center of her chest that she recognized as longing. She wanted to know more about this version of him. Her eyes darted to Tony, and she knew that the feeling extended to him as well. Being a demon was... confusing. She wanted these emotions and the freedom that came with the lack of structure, but there was something to be said for knowing what to expect. 

She had no idea what to expect from the rest of this day or the rest of her life. It was not an encouraging thought, but she wouldn't change her mind even if that was an option available to her.


	3. I found a way to let you in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fill for Natasha Romanov Bingo - I1: Natasha/Tony/Bucky

Tony introduced her to the internet. It was very helpful, except for the occasions where it was fucking useless. (Another perk of not having grace, she could swear. It made her anger much more satisfying.) For example, it could explain how to make every single type of bread and where a mistake might have occurred, but it couldn't describe the emotion she was feeling. Her best help for this would be Bucky, but she was trying to sort out her emotions by herself. Annoyance had been a pain to figure out. It had felt like a parade of ants under her skin, and she'd thought that had been her changed body letting her know about an illness. She figured out that she was annoyed, and Bucky told her that demons couldn't sick in any way an angel couldn't as well. 

This was different. It wasn't anything bad, she knew that much. It was similar to the warm tingle she'd gotten when she looked at Tony after he knew what they were, but it- well, it was different. That had been like a blanket's warmth. This was more like the pull to stand under the sun on a windy day. 

Tony stuck his head in the room and interrupted her musings. "Hey Nat! Bucky's going to grab some take-out, did you want to go with him?" 

And there was the pull. It had something to do with Tony and Bucky both, but no matter how many times she turned it over in her mind, she couldn't piece it together. Yet. "Yes." She got to her feet fluidly and walked to the doorway, putting a hand on Tony's shoulder as she passed. There was a light flush on his cheeks, and she wondered if it was from her or something he was thinking about. She wanted it to be from her. She kept walking, able to sense Bucky's location now that they were both demons. 

Bucky greeted her with an arm around her waist and a kiss pressed to her cheek. 

Natasha leaned into it and- after a moment's thought- gave him a kiss in return, her lips scratching against his scruff. 

The walk out of the building and to the store was quiet, as per usual. It was only when the basket was half full that Natasha broached the topic. "How did you know you were in love with Tony?" 

"It's hard to describe. Kinda like... a warm feeling when I think about 'im. I want to spend all my time with him, and if I don't see him for a while, I get sad." 

"That's not very helpful." 

Bucky shrugged. "I told you it's hard to describe. It's not like I read a definition of love and put it together. I'm not completely certain that what we have now is love," he admitted. "I'm trying my best, but feelings are complicated." 

"Tony said there are different kinds of love." 

"Yes, and differentiating between those is even more complicated. You're asking me questions like I'm an expert, Natasha, and I'm not. I'm stumbling around in the dark here." 

"We can see in the dark." Light and dark were human concepts, not celestial ones. 

"It's a figure of speech," Bucky muttered. "Whatever. Who do you think you love?" 

"You. Tony." It's not as though she knew anyone else. 

Bucky hummed. "You'll have to ask Tony. He knows more than either of us." 

"I suppose I will when we get back." 

* * *

"Hey guys," Tony said conversationally when they came down to his workshop. "How was shopping?" 

"I think I love you," Natasha said instead of answering. 

Tony jerked, looking at her with wide eyes. "Uh." 

"And Bucky. Feelings are confusing. He said I should talk to you about it." 

Tony glanced at Bucky, who nodded, seemingly unbothered by his best friend being in love with his boyfriend. Tony didn't mind dating two people as long as they both knew about it, and it looked like demons-- or fallen angels or whatever they called themselves-- didn't have qualms about it the way most humans did. Obviously he loved Bucky and was happy to let his friend stay with them, but this was not the expected turn of events. Not that he was shocked, per se, but really, what were the chances that there were two different demons (or fallen angels) that fell in love with him? He was pushing the bounds of probability with this, and it wasn't even his fault. Natasha thought she might be in love with him. He could deal with that, if only because Bucky didn't mind. And yes, Natasha was absolutely gorgeous and good company besides, but... god this whole thing was so confusing. He was just going to answer her questions as best he could and call it a day. "Okay," Tony said slowly, because he couldn't believe that he was now the expert on emotions. "Uh, are you not sure if you're in love?" 

Natasha nodded. 

"Alright. Can you- um, describe how you're feeling? Or how you think it feels?" 

Natasha told him, being a little more in depth than she'd been with Bucky at the store. She told Tony about the warmth, how she got annoyed when she wasn't around them, about the good version of butterflies in her stomach, and pretty much every tiny detail she thought might be important. 

"That does sound like love, but here's the deal: infatuation can feel like love, but it doesn't last as long." 

Both Natasha and Bucky blinked in confusion. "What's infatuation?" 

"It... god, okay. It's kinda like short term love. Everything you just described sounds like love, but love is supposed to last for a while. Infatuation is more like you meet someone really great but after three dates you learn that you're not compatible." Or that they're a fucking fascist, which wasn't as easy to spot as Tony used to think. People were surprisingly good at hiding that when they wanted to. "And then all those feelings are gone in a flash, even though it felt real." 

"So it's love," Natasha said, apparently having decided that they weren't incompatible. 

"Basically, yeah. But the important thing to remember is that feelings do change over time, and there's nothing wrong with admitting that." 

"Hm. Thank you, Tony," she said, then left the room. 

"Is she mad at me?" Tony asked Bucky. 

"Doubtful. She needs time to think, same as we do." 

"We need time to think?" 

"She said that she's in love with us. You gotta think about what you're interested in." 

"Huh. I can't believe that I have to think about my emotions since you showed up. I used to be able to go from day to day feelings lots of things and never analyzing it, but now you're here and I'm constantly having to  _ think _ about things. I hate it." 

"No you don't." 

"I hate it a little bit." 

"Hm." 

Tony groaned, long and extended. "I hate you even more for this." 

"Does that mean you're interested?" 

"Have you met her? Of course I'm interested. Are you?" 

Bucky raised in eyebrow. "As you said, I have met her." 

Tony blew out a breath, looking like a child pouting as he sunk in his seat. "You make my life so much more complicated. Even forgetting about the whole angels/demons thing, I'm dealing with all sorts of new shit now." 

"You'll survive," Bucky said, which Tony thought was a little callous while he was unhappy, but it was hard to feel hurt by it when he put his hand on the back of Tony's neck and rubbed. 

"I'm feeling a distinct lack of compassion from you right now." 

"Natasha was always the more compassionate one." 

"Not saying you're wrong, but I'm doubtful about that. All the love in the world for you two, but she kind of looks like she would stab me and then file down her nails two seconds later." 

"She's soft. You'll learn that about her." 

"Soft compared to humans or compared to angels? Or- I don't know, demons. Celestial beings." 

Bucky considered it for a moment, then quietly answered, "Compared to me." 

"You're so soft you could be a teddy bear." 

Bucky hummed, neither confirming nor denying, but Tony had the feeling he was doing that for Tony's peace of mind. 


End file.
